


Billy

by GreenPhoenix



Category: Homicide: Life on the Street, Law & Order: SVU
Genre: Gen, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-12
Updated: 2016-08-12
Packaged: 2018-07-19 14:50:00
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,000
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7365970
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GreenPhoenix/pseuds/GreenPhoenix
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tim Bayliss is hiding in New York when he meets an old friend.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Billy

**Author's Note:**

  * For [sidewinder](https://archiveofourown.org/users/sidewinder/gifts).



He’s been living as a bartender for weeks now, since he gave up his old self.  
Tim Bayliss was a good man; at least he used to be a good man.  
That was before he killed a man, well two men. One was in self-defense, but not the other.  
Luke Ryland would have gone on killing, but it was not for him to be judge, jury and executioner. It wasn’t his call, but he had to do something, so he did.  
Tim recalls Frank’s eyes filled with tears as he confessed his sin to his old friend.  
He wanted absolution, but Frank had none to give.  
Frank could not bring himself to arrest him either, or turn him in.  
Frank wasn’t even a cop anymore, how did that happen?  
Tim left his old life.  
He tends a bar in New York and he calls himself Billy.  
It’s easier than to answer to Tim these days.  
He recalls the women he knew, Juliana, Emma, Claire and even Laura and Renee.  
He recalls the men too, kind, gentle Chris Rawls and the cop who stood him up.  
The Frank lookalike.  
They all knew him, but not like Frank did.  
Juliana was only getting over Mike and the rest of them didn’t love him either.  
He pours himself a scotch and tries not to think too much at this late time.

*  
He has few friends, but that’s not unusual.  
Even when he was with the squad they found him odd.  
He did gain respect even if it took long. Adina’s shadow will never truly leave, though he forgets the ones he did get justice for.  
It’s as it should be.  
Meldrick and Gharty found his sexuality off-putting at best and repulsive at worst.  
Frank was, well Frank.  
There’s a space in his heart where Frank used to be and it’s empty.

*  
One night he sees an old friend, and he smiles. He’s not supposed to smile anymore.  
John Munch, accompanied by a bright young thing.  
“Tim,” says John. “Is that you?”  
“Yes,” says Tim. "I 'm known as Billy here."  
“The old gang don’t know where you are.”  
“It’s best it stays that way. “  
“I see,” says John.  
“Who’s he?” asks Brian.  
“My old partner,” says John.  
“The first round is on me,” says Tim brightly.  
“Thanks,” says Brian.  
Tim pours and John’s face betrays his confusion over this turn of events.

*  
“I had to escape,” says Tim.  
“I know, Frank told me. He says he’s worried.”  
“Let him be. I had to leave.”  
“Why?” asks John.  
“Now’s not the time. Maybe later..”  
“Why shall I call you Billy?”  
“I’m incognito for now.”  
“Undercover?” asks Brian.  
“Sort of,” says Tim.  
John knows that’s not quite true.  
“You are Clark Kent,” says John.  
Tim stifles a laugh.  
Brian yawns and falls asleep on his stool.  
“I should call him a cab,” says John.  
“He can sleep in the guest room,” says Tim. “Mi casa es su casa and all.”  
“He’s a good guy,” says John.  
“I know the type. I used to be one.”  
“You still are Timmy,” says John.  
Tim’s brown eyes are haunted.  
They put Brian to bed with combined efforts.  
He snores inelegantly, and John stifles a laugh at his expense.  
He is not going to tease Brian about this in the morning.  
Not much anyway. Brian is used to his teasing, and he doesn’t want to disappoint in that regard.

*  
In Tim’s room above the bar they talk.  
“Why did you leave your old life?” asks John.  
“I killed a man,” says Tim darkly.  
“The homeless guy? That was self-defense.”  
“No, not him. Luke Ryland..I told Frank.. he couldn’t turn me in, but he never wanted to see me again.”  
“Ryland was a serial killer. You saved lives, Tim.”  
“I thought of eating my gun,” says Tim, eyes downcast with shame.  
“Not on my watch, Timmy,” says John fiercely, memories of his father's suicide too strong to bear another loss like that.  
“I’m a killer.”  
“So am I.”  
“Gordon Pratt, huh?” says Tim, still with keen insight.  
“Can’t admit to it, but there it is.”  
“Yes. We are bad men, then,” sighs Tim. His world is still black and white, and to John it has always been much grayer, much more complex.  
“I know what evil lurks in the hearts of men.”  
“Are you quoting the Shadow at me?”  
“From one vigilante to another..”  
“John..”  
“Shut up, Tim. Let me comfort you,” John says with a glint in his eye.  
Tim lets him. It’s been a long time since he has touched anyone. His past liaisons are but a dim memory, and he never thought anyone could care for him again. He was resigned to loneliness and sorrow.

*

They chase the shadows of the past away in each other’s arms. It’s been a long time, and yet it’s not hard to remember the moves of this dance. John is overcome when Tim licks semen from his hand in a kitten-like fashion. He sees it as a blessing, this man being here with him with such adoration in his eyes. Tim is equally spellbound by their joining.  
His previous experiences have been manifold, from taking Emma in her coffin and feeling alive, to fumbling with Chris into a realm of almost teenage eagerness.  
Tim vaguely recalls Juliana sneering when he took to long to climax, and she wanted to go back to sleep, muttering that she was never letting him come over again.  
He only ever borrowed his past partners, except maybe Chris.  
This is nothing like that, even with alcohol dulling his senses. This is almost like coming home.

*  
In the morning Tim is sleeping soundly and John smiles.  
Tim’s demons have left him alone for one night at least.  
Billy is a refuge for a haunted soul, a place for Tim to be remade.  
John thinks of the future and knows it will have to happen somehow.  
For now, they have each other. It is more than enough.


End file.
